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Hell Comes to Frogtown (1987)

Nomination Year: 1995
SYNOPSIS:  In the post-war future, fertile males are scarce. A government agency dedicated to repopulating the Earth finds one: Sam Hell (Roddy Piper). His mission? To enter mutant-controlled territory, free a bevy of captured women, and impregnate them. You'd think he'd be thrilled at such a task, but the place they're being held is Frogtown, where strange-looking and dangerous scum hang out. Plus, as if it's not enough of a "problem" that every woman he encounters wants to have sex with him on the spot, the government has harnessed him with a special high-tech chastity belt which is rigged to explode if he doesn't behave! Ouch! Well, for the sake of Mankind, let's hope he's up to the task.

Most Ludicrous Premise

It's a Hard Job, But Somebody Has To Do Them...Er, It
Get a load of the all-important mission: as one of the last fertile males, Roddy has to enter Frogtown, rescue some gorgeous babes, and impregnate them. Did Piper write this screenplay himself, or what? Must've been inspired by all those women telling him "not if you were the last man on Earth."

"Let's Up The Rating To 'R'"

Come to Attention, Soldier!
The beautiful second-in-command on their mission just can't resist Roddy, so, contrary to all orders, she disrobes and slathers her naked body all over him in an attempt to seduce him. More evidence that Piper was a secret producer or something.

Deus Ex Machina

Just Watch That Thing When the Director Yells "Cut," Okay?
Roddy's been captured and is hanging by his wrists in a dungeon. The frog leader is about to cut off Roddy's, um, chastity belt with a chainsaw. Just at the crucial moment, it runs out of gas. The chainsaw, that is.

Actors/Directors of Note
Actor Claim to Fame
Roddy Piper As "Rowdy Roddy Piper," he used to be a pro wrestler 
Cec Verrell  
Rory Calhoun  
Nicholas Worth  
Kristi Somers  
Sandahl Bergman Dirty-blonde female warrior love interest who died in Conan 
William Smith NOT Will Smith. This guy is a big bruiser who played "Falconetti" in Rich Man, Poor Man and fought with Clint Eastwood in Any Which Way You Can 
Suzanne Solari  
Jeffrey Hutchinson  
Brian Frank  
Johnnie Saiko did creature effects for Hell Comes to Frogtown 
Director Claim to Fame
Donald G. Jackson aka "Maximo T. Bird" when he felt like it 
R.J. Kizer husband to cousin of sarah-marie belcastro 

Bryan Cassidy

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