Hardware (1990)
M.A.R.K. 13

Nomination Year: 2004
SYNOPSIS:  In a post-apocalyptic future, an ex-soldier finds the head of a robot in the desert. He decides to give it to his girfriend, who makes sculptures out of old machine parts. However, this head is not quite ready to give up the ghost-in-the-machine completely: It rebuilds itself with the spare parts from the woman's sculptures and then goes on a killing rampage through the vestige of human society.

Oblivious

How about a Little Fire, Scarecrow?
Uh, miss? You're on fire. Miss? There you go.

"Let's Up The Rating To 'R'"

Wouldn't His Cybernetic Hand Rust?
Our hero and heroine take a shower together, and start to make mad, passionate love ... as viewed by her creepy neighbor through his camera with telephoto lens (as he listens to a music-box rendition of "Silent Night").

Creepiest "Let's Up The Rating to 'R'" ever.

"Alas, Poor Yorick"

The Portrait of Door-in-Guy
A cop is caught in the power doors, which the killer robot is manipulating. They keep slamming back and forth on him, until he goes to pieces. Firing his gun as he goes. And killing somebody.

Best One-Liner

Ill-Timed Come-on Line
The creepy stalker neighbor starts to hit on our heroine.
"There's a killer robot running loose in my apartment," she says.
His reply? "That's okay, we can go to my place."

Actors/Directors of Note
Actor Claim to Fame
Dylan McDermott Played Bryan Bedford in the remake of Miracle on 34th Street 
Stacey Travis  
John Lynch  
William Hootkins Red Six in Star Wars (the fat guy, Porkins, who blows up in the trench) 
Iggy Pop Hard-core rocker, the Father of Punk 
Director Claim to Fame
Richard Stanley Disgraced helmer of The Island of Dr. Moreau (1996), thrown off the set after the first day; he wore a dog mask and sneaked back on the set 

Bryan Cassidy

To the Film Gallery Return to Lobby
[Smithee Film Gallery] [Return to Lobby]


© 2011-2017 Bryan D. Cassidy, Greg Pearson, Matthew Quirk, and Kevin Hogan. All Rights Reserved.