S.I.C.K.: Serial Insane Clown Killer (2003)
Nomination Year: 2006
SYNOPSIS: Every bit as Bad as it sounds. Low-budget, Badly Acted, and pointless. Just the way we like 'em. Whenever a character mentions something that happened to them in the past, we get a mini-flashback. Annoying. Oh, the plot? Basically, Brandon, a corporate drone, plans a big weekend with a couple of friends and a chick he's been hot for at the office. On the way to Brandon's secluded family cabin (a whole 12 miles from nowhere), they rescue a slutty hitchhiker. But the weekend disintegrates as a series of strange pranks (mostly dolls without heads) turn deadly and the group turns on one another in doubt and suspicion. Oh, and a killer clown shows up and starts killing everyone. In all fairness, the end twist was adequate: it turns out Brandon and the hitchhiker bitch Denise are brother and sister (made sicker because they had sex earlier). They're part of a crazy family that includes "Uncle Billy," the killer clown. They lure unsuspecting folks out here and stage this sick death-game with them to mess with their minds before murdering them. This film has some of the most drawling, deadpan acting I've ever seen. You just want to punch them all in the face. Especially Brandon.
- Stupidest-Looking Monster
Mark sees his wife, almost cheerfully saying "Where've you been?" But when he jostles her, her head falls off and The Fat Clown -- really dumb-looking -- begins to chase him. No matter how fast Mark goes, the Clown, like Pepe Le Pew, has no problems keeping up with him at a slow trudge.
- Inane Dialogue
A Fun Weekend
Weird screams. Someone's leaving threatening messages and headless dolls all over. Susan's missing. Yet...there's nothing to fear.
- Worst Picture
The Girls Act Scared--Well Not ACT, Really
The Clown attacks their stronghold, tosses in a head, and the strain begins to show. Denise slaps Tracy and there's lots of swearing.
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