Grave of the Vampire (1974)
Les Enfants de Frankenstein
Seed of Terror
Nomination Year: 2009
SYNOPSIS: Starring Michael Pataki! From one kind of "Dirt Gang" to another. It's the story of an undead rapist who spawns a half-man/half-vampire that hunts him through the years. Finds him, too.
- "Alas, Poor Yorick"
Now There's a Twist
Nosy detective starts poking around the graveyard. He opens the (surprisingly light-lidded) crypt. There's a coffin inside. He opens that, too! Nope, no vampire. Whew. Zoom! The vampire suddenly runs in from offscreen instead! He chokes him, punches him, slams the lid down on the cop's head, then sucks on him. It's like Pataki said, "There's no way in hell I'm climbing back into that coffin." Director: "Well, then, I dunno, just run in from the side, okay?" I have to admit I was all set for the detective to be the Only One Who Suspects What's Really Going On and goes on to help the hero. Turned out he was the Only One Who Suspects What's Really Going On who tops the oh-you're-so-dead list.
- Worst Science
Some Say Abortion Is Murder, I Say Not Aborting Is Suicide
It's not often a film of this caliber makes a statement about a contemporary and socially relevant issue. And this is no exception. "Olga I would like to talk to Leslie alone for a few minutes." Stilted and Bad. Doc: "What's inside your womb is dead. It isn't a human being. It'll drag you down and it'll kill you." Leslie: "I'm keeping my parasite--er, baby!"
He says "You have lovely hair." She says, "Yes, I was a photographer's model." But neither move their lips. Then BLIP they start talking normally.
- Acting Appropriately Stupid
Make Me a Vampire!
The pretty doctoral student (the blonde's roommate) had a good head on her shoulders...or so I thought. But she turned out to be a freaky vamp wannabe. And here she begs the evil vampire to turn her into one. With predictable results.
- Crummiest Ending
The End Or Is It?
The hero fights and kills the vampire. Looking exhausted, he approaches the body. He looks sick and afflicted. Ann comes out to see. We think his vampire half is leaving, but nooo... He shouts "Get away from me, Ann!" And turns into a vampire. He stares stupidly at the camera as we see: THE END OR IS IT? It's a beautiful thing.
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