Speed Demon  (2003)
Nomination Year: 2012
SYNOPSIS: A Speed Demon is an Ancient Sumerian Demon ... of speed. The shirtless car-loving hunks of Nonspecifictown love cars, and they wander around a lot without shirts on.

One of their number (Jesse) goes off to college, and when he comes home, he finds out that in his absence, the other hunks (and their girlfriends/hangers-on) have formed a sort-of speed cult. With bizarre tighty-whitey rituals. After his brother is killed in a race against the leader of the cult, Jesse must stand against them.

The plot thickens when it turns out that Jesse's father used to have a Speed Demon, and the gang leader wants it to add to its own. Plot twists fly thick and sluggish, but it seems the gang/cult/pod can only be countered with a series of the dullest, slowest, most ponderous races that one can (or should) imagine.

Other appropriate words to describe this film would be "slow," "plodding," and "get on with it already!"
Kevin Hogan
Smithee Award Nominations
"WHAT?!"
The Cult's Dress Code.
The Speed Demon requires a perverse purification ritual that involves thick viscous fluids and mostly-naked men rubbing each other. No, really! It's motor oil or Speed Blood or something, and the tighty-whitey boxer briefs are apparently mandatory attire. And just like everything else about this movie, it takes minutes and minutes and minutes for relatively little to happen.
Sorry, this clip has not yet been made available!
Directors
Director Claim to Fame
David DeCoteau Also credited as Julian Breen, Ellen Cabot, Richard Chasen, Dave DeCoteau, Eric Mancini, David McCabe, Jack Reed, Victoria Sloan, Martin Tate, Joseph Tennent, and Mary Crawford -- so far. I'd try to disguise my name, too, if I had nearly 200 directors' credits, all crap. Following the pattern of most of his messterpieces, his next made-for-TV flop should be called The Wrong Director
Cast
Actor Character Claim to Fame
Collin Stark <Not Yet in Database>  
Mark Ian Miller <Not Yet in Database>  
Trevor Harris <Not Yet in Database>  
Mike Cole <Not Yet in Database>  
Robert Donavan <Not Yet in Database>  
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