99 & 44/100% Dead (1974)
99% Muerto
Attento Sicario: Crown è in Caccia
Call Harry Crown
Harry Crown... 99,44% Nekros!
Kogels a Kontant
König Ballermann
Martwy w 99,44 Procentach
Melkein Kuollut
Yüzde 99 ölüm

Nomination Year: 2012
SYNOPSIS:  We watched it and now we're all wondering what the heck was 99 & 44/100% dead. Did anybody get strung up for supposed cattle rustling and left to die? Nope. Did anyone get shot at, set on fire and crunchered in a metal squishy device and STILL keep on coming? Nope. OooOoooOooo! I got it! Someone was a skilled assassin but suffered amnesia when a job went wrong! Ahhhh ... nope.

Then what was only about 0.56 alive?

The answer is ... I think this movie got someone else's title. Somewhere, someone is watching a horror/drama movie where the hero is a bubbling mutilated corpse that Will! Not! Die! and they are trying to figure out what's so Mafia Wars of New York about it.

This movie is about an up-and-coming crime boss of the NYC underworld (Big Eddie), who is successfully muscling in on the established crime boss (Uncle Frankie)'s territory. Uncle Frankie isn't doing well at all, in fact the local bookie gives the incumbent 5 to 8 odds (which still isn't 99 & 44/100% of anything), but then Uncle Frankie has an ace up his sleeve. Uncle Frankie has the clout to call on Harry Crown, hit man extraordinaire, to come help him out (Movie factoid! One of the alternate titles for this project is indeed Call Harry Crown, which makes a lot more sense than 99 & 44/100% Dead). Of course, Big Eddie also has a hit man, so things don't go exactly swimmingly for Harry when he comes back to his old haunts.

Speaking of swimming, the best part of the film was the sort of endcapping travelogue diorama of "things that get sent into the East River." Apparently, it's a whole festival of people in cement shoes, contraband, and other things that either needed to get dumped in a hurry or were dumped as a message. The East River is also surprisingly clean with a cheery background ragtime music ambiance. This has nothing to do with Harry but you know someone is going to end up in the bottom of the river before the film is done.

In fact, you know a lot about this film before anything happens. Will Harry kindle the love spark with his old flame? Will there be a misunderstanding between old flame and new vixen? Will said flame come to some harm because of Harry? Will Harry's assassin padawan get his assassin jedi spurs at the end of the flick? Will David Caruso eventually find acting inspiration in Harry Crown's eyeglass wear? Will there be a climactic fight between Harry and Big Eddie's crack-shot hit man in a laundry facility? OK, we didn't guess the laundry facility exactly, but you can see where we felt like we were practically writing the movie before it happened. I can't say any of the flick caught any of us by surprise.

Movie Factoid! Not only did Ann Turkel, the old flame, wind up marrying Richard Harris just after this movie, she was nominated for a Golden Globe for her acting. I have to wonder if all the other actresses that year were positively horrific because all I can say about Ann's acting is that it was the least stoned performance of any of the girls on this film. Hmmm, if the title were 99 & 44/100% stoned, that might explain a lot....

Smithee Award Winner! "Alas, Poor Yorick"

I'll take the express elevator!
The hired killer is so psyched out by Harry that he doesn't notice the elevator door has opened up with no elevator present ... and consequently falls through to his death. Ha ha ha whoops!

"Cutting Butter With A Chainsaw"

A triple play!
The gangster's car is shot up, then it explodes, then it goes off the dock into the river.

Actors/Directors of Note
Actor Claim to Fame
Richard Harris yep, he played "Dumbledore" in some of the Harry Potter movies, that Richard Harris 
Chuck Connors The Rifleman in the TV series of the same name. 
Director Claim to Fame
John Frankenheimer why yes, he did direct the original The Manchurian Candidate 

Jeannette Quirk

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© 2011-2019 Bryan D. Cassidy, Greg Pearson, Matthew Quirk, and Kevin Hogan. All Rights Reserved.